Deeks screws up royally spoilers for S3E10
by Blissful.Oblivion
Summary: Normally Kensi would cast the blame on whoever it was due. She would accept the consequences and move on. But Deeks isn't just anyone. DENSI DENSI DENSI Woo Hoo!
1. Chapter 1

*Bullets began speeding through the air like flies, and the loud and extreme commotion made it impossible to think*

"Ambush!"

_Where the hell is she? Dammit Deeks you let her out of your sight for one second and everything goes to hell. _

"Deeks get the girl" Callen practically ran into him and dashed off with his gun in hand.

_No shit, Callen, I just gotta find her. Gotcha!_ He ran over to who he was **supposed**to be protecting: an Arabian princess, talk about pressure. Relief washed over him as he got within 6 feet of Princess Jamila al-Hadeen, but it quickly dissipated as he heard another two gunshots and he sprinted to the princess and tackled her to the ground behind a wall.

"Are you okay?" Deeks felt like he was having a heart attack, everything was happening so fast, including his heartbeat. Their target was quite a beauty, still young enough to have an aura of innocence about her but old enough to be sultry and exotic with a change in her glance.

"Wow Detective Deeks, do you always give this attention to the people you protect?" she smirked and looked down at his hands on her shoulder and waist. He was staring at her with concern and still sort of pinning her down with his own body as a shield.

"Well, what can I say? You had me at hello." Deeks grinned widely for a second and then became serious again, pulled Jamila up, grabbed his gun and turned the safety off. "We need to go."

"What about Kensi?" Jamila al-Hadeen had gotten to know her protectors since they began as her protection detail, and she liked them much more than she liked most of her family

"She can take care of herself. My job is to take care of you." Marty felt bad about leaving his partner but he didn't really have a choice and he knew it. Deeks glanced from around the wall to make sure no one would be shooting at them, but luckily for him, the fire fight was taking place further away. "We are going to run to that wall, wait, and when I tell you so, we will dash down those emergency stairs. I will enter first. When I say 'clear' you will **follow** **me** down the stairs and into the underground garage."

The princess had maintained her calm and collected façade for most of the day and was just now beginning to reveal her cracks. "And then what?"

"Jamila, don't worry, we will get into the car and drive to the next safe house". Although he was putting a brave face on for her, Deeks was scared, something didn't feel right. He needed backup. So he spoke into the mic: "Guys, I need one of you to take her to the house with me."

Sam's voice rang out "Deeks, you need to get her out of here!"

Deeks rebutted, "It's a lot of area to watch without someone else watching our backs!"

Then Callen spoke, "Deeks! Leave! Now! We're busy here.

"Kens?" He sounded desperate and he was wishing that his partner would come with him.

"Deeks I'm really sorry, but I'm being shot at, I don't want to bring fire on you two, just be careful. We'll follow you when we're done here."

He couldn't believe it, he was alone, why wasn't there another team assigned to us? There was way too much fire power. And with that thought Deeks signalled for the princess to run.

…..

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><p>"What the hell was that about?" Kensi had just shot another round of bullets and then almost instantly the other side stopped shooting.<p>

Sam peeked over the edge of the table and makeshift shield and was stunned. "They're gone."

Callen leapt up "What? That doesn't make any sense?"

"Something's wrong, I can just feel it" Kensi knew that something was just **off**.

And Sam felt it too, his entire body filled with dread. "Deeks and Jamila are alone. They are easy targets, this was a set up and we all played right into their hand – we let Deeks leave without backup. We've got to get to him before the shit storm hits them head on.

Kensi was close to freaking out, but knew they didn't have time for that "Deeks! It's a trap!"

…...


	2. Chapter 2

Deeks was cautiously treading down the stairs with his gun out and pointed forward; he would look up and down with his gun after every flight of stairs and was thankful that he hadn't met any resistance yet.

He spoke too soon.

Two men with guns were waiting at the next flight down and the detective saw them out of the corner of his eye and fired four shots from the middle of the stairs through the railings. He got them both, kicked their guns away and checked their now non-existent pulse and prepared to enter the garage.

"Deeks! Dammit Deeks! Do you hear me?" Kensi was roaring through his ear piece, he'd been blocking most of it out to keep concentrated and it worked; but it also meant that he didn't hear the 'it's a trap' part.

"Yeah, I'm here, we're about to go into the garage", Deeks was about to grab the door handle.

"No! Stop! Wait for us; we think it's a trap. Sam, Callen and I are coming down the stairs, did you meet any resistance?"

"Two guys at the bottom, but be careful Kens, some more could be up there"

He told Jamila that they were waiting for the rest of the team.

"Thank you Marty, I don't know what I would do without you guys" the princess was truly grateful for NCIS's help and was anxious for it to all be over.

"You're welcome, it's been fun, mostly" Deeks gave a comforting smile and then looked through the glass pane in the door. His smile quickly dissolved as he frowned, shook his head and spoke to his team via their microphones. "We have a problem down here", Deeks put his finger to his lips and looked at Princess Jamila, and he then used his arm to push her against the wall

Callen responded, "What's happening Deeks? Are you okay?"

Detective Deeks scoffed, "I can see about five men with guns in the parking lot, some are slowly moving towards us, and the other three that I can see are stationed near the walls", he paused to think, "Where are you three?"

This time Sam spoke first, "We should be there in a minute; we're just trying not to make noise in case someone else is in here" the Navy SEAL felt bad for their liaison, they shouldn't have let him go alone. Sam was the one shouting at him to go, they weren't prepared, and that doesn't happen too often.

Back down the stairs Marty Deeks, said "They're almost here", he could barely hear, so many thoughts were rushing through his mind, in fact he glanced to his left to make sure she was still with him. "How you holding up?"

"Pretty well, all things considered" she gave a weak smile even though she wasn't looking at Deeks but rather the staircase, it didn't really matter though because he barely registered her response, he was on DEFCON 1.

His skin was on fire as the blood raced through his veins and his arms shot up when he saw movement on the staircase; he motioned to his left for her to move all the way over to the side.

* * *

><p>Agent Kensi Blye was like the little sister of the team, so when she tried to lead them down the stairs, she sort of knew it would be in vain.<p>

"Kensi" both senior agents Callen and Hanna spoke at once but Sam continued, "get behind G, and in front of me".

She knew they were just trying to protect her but she just wanted to get down there to help Deeks.

Finally there were almost at the bottom, they hadn't seen anyone else yet and for that she was grateful yet she felt that the day was far from over. Then Callen stopped and pointed his gun, Kensi was right behind him and she relaxed her shoulders immediately as her eyes followed Callen's.

_Her partner._

They all rushed down the stairs and almost felt the urge to hug each other for making it this far.

Jamila had been standing off to the side, and smiled in relief, it seemed like she hadn't smiled in weeks, in reality it hadn't been too long ago. "Kensi! Thank goodness you all are alright."

All of the agents had their turn looking through the glass pane and Callen stared at Deeks, "I don't see anyone " Deeks turned his head toward the team leader and his face clearly showed confusion, "it's been about two minutes since you called us, are you sure you saw people there?"

It had been a long day, sure, but he knew what he saw. "They must have moved, but we need to get out of here".

Kensi interjected, "he's right, these two have been in the same place for too long, this is the only chance we're going to have to leave. Sam and Callen will go out first, then Jamaal, and then Deeks and I'll hold up the end".

None of the men mush like the idea of Kensi being exposed but they didn't have time to argue.

* * *

><p>They burst through the door and still saw no one.<p>

They began to navigate in between the cars to find their SUV, Sam caught sight of an armed Arab and fired off two shots – they hit the intended target and the man fell to the ground. Sam said "keep moving".

NCIS had provided them with two black SUV's and as they rounded around the corner all hell threatened to break loose… again. About six armed men were just waiting with their weapons pointed and when Callen saw them and quickly fired off a few shots in their direction.

"We've got company!" Callen yelled as he ran back to the centre of the group. "Deeks make sure you stay with the girl!"

"Got it" Deeks nodded his head and steered Jamila behind a car as the other three fought off their armed adversaries. He was glad that Jamila was still safe but he kept watching the gun fight because he felt guilty for leaving his partner unprotected. Much to his enjoyment he shot someone from behind the car since he was practically out of sight. But then his heart practically came to a halt. Everyone else was preoccupied and didn't notice another man dressed in black surrounding them as he locked his eyes on to Kensi's frame. "Kensi!" Deeks's heart was pounding as he ran over to Kensi as he started shooting his gun at the man with the black coat. He knocked his partner to the ground as bullets whizzed past them and fired off an additional four gun shots, with two of them hitting the man and he fell dead to the ground. "Hey, you okay?" Deeks brushed her hair out of her face and stared at her.

"Deeks – I'm fine! Where's Jamila?"

Deeks couldn't believe his mistake and leapt up to run back to Jamila. "Shit."

The girl had gotten up from crouching by the car with worry on her face, not merely for herself but also for the agents she had become acquainted with.

Thank God she's okay, Deeks thought to himself, he was running towards her and realized that he had done a lot of that today.

A lone gunshot sounded and Deeks looked in the direction that he heard it. And then he heard a gasp. "Marty?" Jamila breathed out.

"No, no, no, no!" Everything seemed to be going in slow motion, Deeks couldn't seem to run fast enough, react fast enough, he barely heard anything except for her breaths. He reached Jamila and fell to the ground putting his hands over the growing blossom of blood that was escaping her chest. "It's going to be okay, Jamila. Okay? Just hold on with me, you are going to make it through this" Deeks was desperate, he had been stupid and forgotten the entire purpose of this mission: protect the girl. He failed.

But despite the circumstances the girl gave a smile, "Don't worry about me Marty, I knew they would get to me eventually, I'm at peace".

He shook his head and tears threatened to spill over his eyes, "I'm so sorry, this is my fault, I was stupid".

It was her turn to shake her head now, "No Deeks, I do not blame you, you care for her even I can see that. This is not your fault, the trial will go along as planned without my presence" she yawned.

"Stay with me, come on". But her eyes closed, and then Deeks relentlessly tapped her, as if to wake her up. And his senses slowly returned to him as he heard the sound of sirens in the distance.

Detective Deeks felt a gentle hand on his shoulder "Deeks?" It was Kensi.

"She's… gone." Deeks could barely comprehend what had happened.

The entire team was in shock and in serious need of a vacation. Kensi couldn't bear to see Deeks, his face was so broken and his entire body seeped of tragedy.

"It's going to be alright." Kensi had knelt down next to Deeks and pulled him up, the medical examiner had arrived and put a sheet over the body.

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><p><strong>So what do people think about this chapter? too brief? too long? too wordy?<strong>

**Thanks!**


	3. Chapter 3

In spite of the emotionally and physically grueling day, the three NCIS agents and LAPD liaison had to return to work to report to Hetty on what went wrong, and they stayed there until the nighttime. Sam and Callen had already left as they had already talked to Hetty and Kensi was waiting downstairs for Deeks. The tiny operations manager walked down the stairs as she caught sight of her junior agent, who she had become quite fond of. She stood in front of Kensi Blye's desk and took a deep breath.

"Ms Blye? Were you planning on spending the night here?"

Even though Kensi was staring straight ahead the entire time she was startled when she heard Hetty's voice and widened her eyes as she tried to formulate a response.

"Um, no, I was actually just waiting for Deeks"

Hetty Lange gave a sad smile to the agent in front of her, "I think it would be best if you went home Kensi, it has been a long day for all of you and I'm sure you'll be able to see your partner tomorrow", Kensi understood that she was effectively being ordered to go home and Hetty continued, "you all may take the day off, after you complete the paperwork on this case".

"Okay".

"Goodnight Ms Blye".

"Goodnight Hetty".

* * *

><p><strong>[The Next Morning]<strong>

Agent Kensi Blye woke up at the same time as usual that morning and decided that she could try to sleep in for a few more minutes since she didn't really have anywhere to be. Unsurprisingly she was fully dressed and ready to leave the house forty-five minutes later. Kensi stopped by the drive-thru to grab a coffee and two donuts.

Not much later after that, she pulled into NCIS and entered the building. She wasn't at all shocked to see Sam and Callen at their desks, doing their paperwork.

"Good morning guys"

Both men mumbled "Morning Kens" as she walked past them to her own desk.

What did surprise her was that Deeks wasn't at his desk yet, what confused her even further was that his desk was looking quite empty, it was lacking Deeks's things on the table.

"Where's Deeks?"

The senior agents looked at each other and paused.

Sam started "Kensi, Deeks –" he paused and looked back at Callen, and now Kensi was nervous and she had a pit in her stomach like something terrible had happen.

Callen could see the panic in her eyes, it was rare that she exposed her emotions but the rest of the team had gotten used to it. So this time Callen spoke "Deeks is gone".

"Gone where?" She couldn't figure out if he had started using his vacation time or if he was going undercover to LAPD again – she didn't really like the fact that she had been the last to know either way.

"Hetty had to fire him" Callen almost winced as he said that and waited to gauge her reaction. He knew that Kensi wouldn't react well and she could be intimidating and scary at times.

Her mouth dropped and it would have been comical if it wasn't so tragic to see Kensi so un-Kensi like. It simply didn't make any sense to her, sure he made a mistake, but everyone made a mistake every once in a while, besides, she probably would've been dead if it hadn't for Deeks. But then again, she wasn't the one who was responsible for the prosecution of Arab terrorists.

"But why?" her voice raised near the end of that sentence, if it had sounded like anger Callen and Sam probably wouldn't have been worried, but it had sounded more like hysteria and that was not a good sign.

So Sam tried to rationalize with her, "Kens, Jamila died because he wasn't doing his job".

And now Kensi was mad, "He **was** doing his job, if he hadn't **I would be the one who was dead!**".

"Kensi, I'm sure he can be reinstated one day, but I'm sure Hetty had to do it"

"Callen, what Hetty should've done was given us more agents to work with!" Callen had to admit that it made sense but it is what it is. Before he could say anything else to her Kensi was walking up to Hetty's office.

Sam said "Oh no." and he stared at Callen before following Kensi. Callen looked up to the sky as if to muster up the strength to argue with Kensi.

* * *

><p>"We're his family Hetty! They don't like him or use him properly at LAPD, you know that."<p>

Callen interjects "Kensi".

"No Callen, no. We betrayed Deeks, he was just becoming one of us… and we threw him under the bus." Kensi's eyes were watery with frustration. That's not what family does Hetty, that's not what friends do."

"Ms Blye… I understand your unhappiness in this matter; I feel the same way about all of this".

"He was my partner Hetty? The one I trusted most of all – I, I just don't think I can find another partner like that, he was annoying, but he was Deeks. Floppy hair, big cheesy grin and all." It seemed as if Kensi was about to give up and walk out, as she shook her head dejectedly. But that's just not her style.

"Ms Blye- I implore you to seek reason, I did not have a choice, Director Vance gave me an order- find what went wrong, and fire them".

"He's not a problem! It was a mistake that under normal circumstances would've resulted in a slap on the wrist" it was quite shocking that Kensi had been able to mouth off to the operations manager for so long.

So Hetty raised her voice and looked sternly at Kensi. "Kensi Blye, I treat you like a member of the family, but now you are going to listen. This was not a normal circumstance and you know it. Also this was the only loophole I could find to avoid firing one of my actual agents. He was a liaison and I realize that that makes him no less of an investigator but alas my hands were tied. It was unfortunate and I am deeply sorry for your loss and what I had to do to him."

"But what if he was an agent? Then what would you have done? Fired him still? I am so grateful for everything that you have done for me Hetty. But, I don't give my trust to just anyone and when I do, I do it wholeheartedly I make sure to support them and earn their trust in return." Kensi thought about what she was going to say next and looked steely-eyed at Hetty and her team.

"Just think about that when you review this conversation, because Deeks is no different from us, like us he risked everything to come to Romania for you, for Callen, in spite of Vance, LAPD and the danger it posed to us all. I apologize for being harsh and rash, and brazen, but…he's… the Sam to my Callen. My Sam. He's one of my best friends, whether he knows it or not". Puts her badge and gun on the table. "I just need some time…I'll fill out the vacation forms now." And so Kensi Blye had left the building.

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><p><strong>I had a bunch of fun writing Kensi's little explosion - but was it too out of character?<strong>

**Thanks!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Previously… **

**Deeks is no different from us. He's… the Sam to my Callen. My Sam. He's one of my best friends, whether he knows it or not". **

**And so Kensi Blye had left the building.**

* * *

><p><em>It was a dark and rainy day and a team of cops ran across the road, and stood outside a building, it looked like a warehouse and Agent Kensi Blye could see one of the men count down from three with the fingers on his left hand. She could see him entering a warehouse alone, his partner wasn't with him and Kensi couldn't figure out why. She saw the other detectives with their backup, but Deeks was alone again and even though he had his vest on, it still wasn't enough protection and that gave her a pit in her stomach. Then she couldn't see her partner anymore, but instead a group of Latin men in another room, in multiple other rooms actually<em>_,__ with weapons. She reckoned that there was going to be a firefight. Yup, there it was. Gunshots reverberated through the warehouse and Kensi Blye tried to run back to her partner, it was far away and she couldn't seem to run fast enough, she was barely moving. All she could think about was how Deeks wasn't being covered properly. It didn't make any sense, if he didn't have backup he should've entered with two other cops, instead he was vulnerable. _

_She was still on the second floor trying to run down the stairs and she looked over the top of the railing and she was frozen where she stood, Deeks was surrounded by the other cops, they had betrayed him. She tried to scream Deeks's name yet all that came out was a strangled whisper – this was wrong, it was all wrong. She tried to reach for a gun and found that she didn't have one, Kensi was in overdrive and only when she heard another, single gunshot could she move again, only then did she have her voice and her gun back. _

_They shot Deeks. And for the first time her voice rang out Deeks's name. The dirty cops tried to run and somehow Kensi had managed to kill every one of them with precision and rage. She'd gotten blood on her hands and it scared her to know that she didn't care. All that she could think about was Deeks, because it had seemed like no time had passed and Deeks had just fallen to the ground with two shots in his chest. _

_Kensi started to cry as she ran towards Deeks, knelt on the ground and spoke to him, told him to hang on, because someone would help them. Deeks smiled weakly at her and told her that everything was going to be okay, he called her princess and for once she didn't argue with him. His eyes closed and he had stopped talking, Kensi tried her absolute hardest to wake him up but she knew that it was over. And her entire body felt like it had broken into a million pieces, the pit in her stomach had exploded and her head was consumed with an unbearable pressure that only partially relented when she held Marty, and cried until her throat hurt, until she had no more tears and felt nauseous with tragedy__.__ She even thought that she was imagining things as she heard Callen's voice and felt him try to pull her away from Deeks. She struggled but eventually gave up and clung onto Callen for support, she felt like a disaster had just hit and it was one from which she would never recover. _

* * *

><p>If Callen thought that yesterday was bad, he hadn't seen anything yet, he went to check on Kensi even though he knew she would hate it. He might have expected Kensi to be doing sit ups or pushups or watching one of her reality shows, maybe even reading a comic book. So when she didn't answer her door at eight in the morning, Callen was unsure of what was going on and so he broke in. Her living room was a mess as always, but her bedroom door was cracked and as he approached the door and was about to knock on the door he heard Kensi mumble Deeks's name and he backpedaled to check that Deeks's car wasn't parked outside. Ok, Deeks is not there – thank God, the team did not need <strong>that <strong>distraction. And then he heard Kensi sniffle, and he peeked in to her room and prayed that she didn't shoot him. Instead she was just lying there entangled in the sheets with a pillow on the floor, clinging to the other one, and her hair was out and messy.

"Kensi?" Callen edged closer to her bed and leaned against the wall, and after he spoke her tears flowed down her face and her body shook with soft sobs. Callen knelt at the edge of Kensi's bed and put his hand on her shoulder, she was clearly dreaming and Callen didn't want her to continue it. "Kens, wake up." He shook her shoulders and stared at her tear-stained face as she woke up.

"Callen" Kensi's eyes were red and wet and she grabbed Callen and hugged him and held onto him as she cried and he patted her back.

"Kens? You okay?" Callen knew better than to ask his junior agent that normally, but this hadn't been a normal week.

She knew Deeks wouldn't have allowed her to say it, but Callen wasn't Deeks. "I'm fine" , but her execution was **so** off, Kensi Blye even winced as she heard her still nasally voice and knew Callen wasn't going to let it go when her voice cracked. You'd think that it was hard to find enough time for her voice to crack in those two words…you'd be wrong, very wrong.

"It was just a nightmare" Kensi was ashamed and stared past Callen and through her window, "G, it felt so real, I've never been so scared in my entire life". The team leader asked his junior agent to tell him about it and surprisingly she did, but there was still something that he didn't quite understand.

"Was someone after you too Kensi?"

Kensi Blye looked up at Callen and shook her head "No, why?"

"Well, why were you scared?"

"Oh. Callen, it was crazy, like I could tell what was going to happen to Deeks but I couldn't help him, and I don't know G, it just felt like, like I would die when he didn't make it. I mean my whole body felt broken. "

Callen thought for a minute and pulled Kensi out of bed "come on, let's go out for coffee".

* * *

><p>Kensi took a bite of her donut and asked Callen what he thought her nightmare was about.<p>

"It means you're partners, and you don't want to be separated… and you know, you care about him", Callen sipped his coffee and peeked over the edge of his cup at Kensi's reaction.

"Well yeah G he's my partner and my friend of course I care. Is that a crime or something?"

It was good to see Kensi being her usual self again and he smiled at this, "Of course not Kensi, I'm just saying, you two spend a lot of time together, you guys have chemistry, and it wouldn't surprise me if you and Deeks had feelings deeper than a simple friendship".

Kensi remained silent and nodded then sighed, "I think you may be right Callen", Kensi looked at Callen and smiled, "look at those detective skills at work".

* * *

><p><strong>I am so proud of this chapter it was supposed to show how Kensi would feel without Deeks not only to readers but to her and Callen as well. I really want to finish this story before Tuesday's episode <strong>_**The Debt **_**airs. So stay tuned! **

**Next Chapter: Kensi finds Deeks.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: DOUBLE UPDATES! **

**A lot of this chapter is pure dialogue, I wasn't sure if it would be effective (so feel free to let me know if you like it or not.) I felt that sometimes I hadn't needed to add words because it seemed like the emotion of these characters would represent their actions and it doesn't hurt to leave some things to the imagination. **

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><p>Kensi Blye walked into the LAPD and took the elevator up to the 3rd floor, as the doors opened she looked up from her watch and saw Deeks flirting with one of the older ladies doing admin at her desk. It seemed that LAPD wasn't nearly as bad a place to work as Kensi had imagined, she stepped out of the elevator and another detective approached her "Hi I'm Detective Marcus Cooper, can I help you with something?" Kensi didn't miss the fact that his eyes looked her up and down. Twice. But Kensi decided to play along because her mood had just improved.<p>

"Well actually _detective_ I think you can" Kensi fluttered her eyelashes and smiled at the detective who clearly didn't know who she was. "I'm going to need to borrow _that_ office", she pointed to the chief's office as she noticed that it was empty.

Detective Cooper looked at the ground and ran his hand through his hair, it would have been adorable if Kensi had cared. "Um, yeah, sure, I mean for a few minutes – are you waiting for the Chief?"

"No, I just want Deeks, thanks though" and she considered that to be her saying goodbye to the kind detective had glared at Deeks when Kensi turned away. Agent Blye walked silently behind Deeks, who was still flirting with the older woman who was now at the photocopier. She saw Kensi and Deeks noticed and began to turn around to see what the older woman was looking at. But Kensi used her hands to cover Deeks's eyes before he could turn around and whispered in his ear "guess who?", and a smile spread across his face as he said Kensi's name and turned around.

Deeks couldn't have been happier to see Kensi, he thought that she blamed him for Jamila's death and was glad to see him go from NCIS. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to talk to my partner obviously; apparently the Chief's office is free"

"_Oh really_, Ms Blye, you shock me with your forwardness", it was a relief to see Kensi and she felt the same way, which is likely the reason why she didn't punch him.

They both heard someone clearing their throat and turned around.

Deeks turned around and spoke to Kensi, "Oh, and Kensi this is Mrs. Peterson she helps me with all the paperwork that I love so much. Mrs. Peterson this is NCIS Special Agent Kensi Blye."

Kensi stuck her hand out to greet Mrs. Peterson and the woman said "It is a pleasure my dear, Marty said that you were beautiful but I had no idea how truthful he was". Kensi stared up at Deeks to find that he looked off to the side and started whistling with his hands in his pockets.

"Let's go Deeks, Chief's office."

* * *

><p>""So I kind of yelled at Hetty and gave her my badge and gun – told her I was taking vacation time".<p>

"You yelled at Hetty … are you insane!" Deeks placed his hands on the desk for support. "Kensi you shouldn't have done that, and why would you waste your vacation time? Normally people have fun, relax, and maybe go away on _vacation_. Why don't you go on an actual vacation Kens, it might do you some good."

"Deeks I went on vacation because of you. I wanted to figure out how you get you back at NCIS and I couldn't do that properly if I was working!"

"You don't need to help me, I'm fine here, I'm a cop, and this is what cops do."

"We both know that you're not just a cop. LAPD cops hate you. Back at OPS you were one of us and you're just happy to leave that and stay here? Is there something that you're not telling me?"

"What do you want me to say! I screwed up! I was fired! I can't just ask for my job back Kensi! It doesn't work like that, I'm sorry; I'm not this super detective that you seem to think I am." "I don't know what you want me to say."

Kensi had never heard Deeks yell like that and she didn't want to hear it again "I don't want much Deeks! Just say that you want to be my partner again and you are going to try to join NCIS again! And if you don't then just say that too!" Kensi walked around the office thinking about what to say next and Deeks was staring at her even though he really didn't want to be there in the middle of LAPD talking – no, arguing with her. "All I have been thinking of since Callen told me you were fired was some clearly dramatized version of you back here. People mocking you, ignoring you – I thought about officers eating all the donuts and not leaving you any. And then I continued my own little Deeks pity party thinking that you were all alone at your desk without friends and backup to listen to your jokes and stare at your goofy smile. Then my delusions got worse as I imagined you beating yourself up and blaming yourself for the death of that girl." Kensi was frustrated at Deeks's stupidity and she simply couldn't understand his behavior. This day was supposed to be much different than the way it was going so far.

"Kensi. Stop. I get it, you were worried."

"Worried! Is that what you think? I had a dream last night that you went in to a raid and you died and I couldn't do anything about it!" Kensi looked up in the air and tried to convince herself not to cry, because Kensi Blye does not cry about a guy, especially not twice in one day, and definitely not in front of him. "Do you understand how I felt?" just thinking about it broke her heart.

Deeks saw Kensi's eyes water and her stare at the ceiling like she was trying to get strength from some divine power. He couldn't bear to see his partner in pain, but that was the problem, he screwed up and isn't her partner anymore. What she didn't understand was that he didn't want to make another mistake, one that would cost him her life. Because he knew that he would never ever get over that loss, but he couldn't tell her that.

"Deeks, it felt like my heart was on fire and I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move and I wasn't even sure that I would want to." She had exhausted herself and sank into a chair in the chief's office, she wondered if he would return to his office and get pissed at Deeks for being in there and brushed her fingers through her hair and sighed from exhaustion. "I'm going out on a limb here, I would never say this to anyone and I just don't know why you don't care."

Deeks knelt down in front of Kensi and took her hands in his, "come on, partner you know I care, but I'm not going to be your partner again." He saw that Kensi was about to talk and put his finger on her lips, "Shhh. Look Kensi, you are amazing and the best partner I've ever had but I'm not going to put you in danger because I can't seem to keep my emotions in check. Jamila died because I chose you over her and I can't let you cloud my judgment and it's not your fault, it's just the way that you are, how I feel." He removed his finger from her lips and waited for her to say something, because she always has something to say.

"Deeks, you don't put me in danger, you're the one who's always saving me." Kensi was amazed that Deeks didn't know how much she needed him; she'd have to tell him that eventually. I knew that you would have my back after the Russians took me: because you stayed with me and guided me through the lasers when it seemed pointless to even try. When we were in that apartment and Sam's CIA friend, Salah had his gun pointed at my head, you stayed calm and when you came back around that corner you told him that if he ever hurt me it would be the last thing he ever did – without hesitation. That's all I want from you Deeks, you. I'm not even sure that many other agents or people in general could handle me, but you do."

Deeks couldn't believe that he was hearing his partner correctly, it was new for her to say what she was feeling and he couldn't say that he didn't appreciate it.

"Deeks, you are my partner and I need you. And I'm pretty sure that you don't want to be here"

"Kens I'm sorry, but I still don't think I'm going to be getting into NCIS again, at least not anytime soon"

"That's why you have me partner, let's get out of here I want another donut" Kensi was happier than she'd felt in a long time, she just wanted to enjoy the rest of her vacation and she was pretty sure that she would. "Let's go on a vacation Deeks"

"Another donut? … Kens, I have a job, besides that's not what partners do, Fern"

"Well Deeks, we're not partners, so should I be getting my bikini or no-"

"-Yes! Yes! Let's go!"

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><p>"So you were worried about me huh?"<p>

"Deeks…" that was Kensi's warning voice and everybody knew, but Deeks simply ignored it.

"Come on Kensi you know you just can't live without me anymore"

"Uh huh"

"You're never going to admit that are you?"

"Not today."

"Wonder Woman could admit it"

"I _could_, but I don't have to – I carry a gun" Kensi smiled sweetly and got into the Cadillac. "So you've got to keep your emotions in check around me huh?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about", Deeks shook his fluffy hair and snickered, "Hey Kens! So you would cry if I died?"

"Ugh Deeks! ... Do I really cloud your judgment, and that's just how you feel about me? What's that all about Deeks?"

"Point taken."

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><p><strong>I'm happy leaving this as the last chapter buuuuut – Epilogue anyone? Click that little Review button and let me know. Love you guys! Thanks! <strong>


	6. Epilogue

**A/N: Heads up, this is the final chapter of this story. I'm sad to see it finish but I hope that you all enjoyed reading it as much as I loved writing it. **

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><p>It was a beautiful evening and Kensi Blye was sitting on the beach with Monty, watching the sunset. The sky had shades of purple, orange, pink and yellow. She rarely had the time to stop and stare at the stunning occurrences that happen every day and was grateful that today was that day. It had been so hard working at NCIS when wasn't Deeks there and she was rarely at the top of her game when he was with LAPD. Her only concession had been when they worked with LAPD on an assignment, it hadn't happened often but it was bittersweet whenever that time came around. It was always difficult to leave Deeks after the case was closed but it was a necessary sacrifice. Sure, they tried to see each other outside of work, but they were both always so busy, which made their time together sparse, but that meant that they always made the best of it. Just like their weekend vacation. Kensi smiled and pet Monty as she thought of their time together. It was a weekend to remember and it was great, they both had so much fun, they fought, sure, but it's inevitable. Deeks taught her how to surf, they would go to restaurants, play at the arcade, Kensi took Deeks to the shooting range and they would compete to be the best shot – Kensi always won, but Deeks's aim definitely improved and that was the goal and she tried to give Deeks a fighting chance. When they went surfing again after that Deeks made sure to surf circles around her at the beach. And when they ended up back at their hotel room they would talk, drink beer, maybe watch TV or sit out on the balcony and go down to the club - they only did that once because things got heated, fast- and then found themselves taking a swim at night in the pool. Kensi chuckled to herself because she had suggested it to cool themselves down, but Deeks had of course made that impossible.<p>

Her face turned slightly red as she remembered that night in the pool. They had been wading around the edges of the pool after doing laps when Deeks spun in front of her and pinned her against the side of the pool. His arms were on either side of her preventing her from moving sideways and he said (as though it hadn't been incredibly obvious to Kensi before) that they were the only ones there. It had seemed like they progressed very quickly from partners and friends to something more, a realization that was not lost on Kensi. But heck, she figured they were on vacation together, something was bound to happen and she was kind of shocked that she wanted it to, and apparently so did Deeks. Kensi nodded to him as she couldn't think of anything to say to him, she was trying not to stare at his incredibly tanned and defined abs that could only be the result of his many years of surfing. Instead she looked up at his face. Big mistake. His baby blue eyes were burning through her and his hair was dripping wet, she felt like she was on fire and was positive that he felt it too.

Deeks had seen Kensi in her bikini a long time ago and was entranced by her body, but being so close to her was intoxicating, seeing every curve of her body, staring down at her lips and her eyes – they begged to be stared at and that he did. When she looked up at him, their faces were inches apart and he was sure that he would never forgive himself if he didn't make a move. When she said his name, it was meant to come out as a warning and Deeks knew that. Instead however her voice came out velvety smooth and low and it was incredibly sexy, he simply couldn't help himself and he could see that Kensi knew it too. Before he could lean in Kensi leapt up and locked her lips with his, it was both memorable and yet far too short, when she came back down, Deeks's head followed with her and when their eyes opened they both stared at each other in shock. Kensi shook her head like she was about to say something that Deeks was sure he wouldn't want to hear. So he grabbed Kensi by her waist and kissed her, at first she didn't respond, but after her initial surprise she was just as committed as Deeks was. She had wrapped her arms around Deeks's neck and after a few minutes of their frantic kisses she wrapped her legs around his waist. Their contact was like a constant fuel to the fire and they couldn't get enough of it. Kensi was trying to think and finding it useless to try, Deeks had long ago stopped thinking about anything except what he was doing at that moment. When Kensi moaned as Deeks was kissing her neck, they both looked at each other and backed away, trying to catch up on their breathing. Deeks tilted his head towards the rooms and told her that they should go. Kensi was grateful for his suggestion because she knew that she wouldn't have had any reservations about continuing what they were doing and going all the way with Deeks that night, and that could've been a big mistake.

By the time that they had returned to their hotel room they had avoided each other's gaze and tried to convince themselves that what they had done was bad, very, very bad. When they stepped into the room they both sighed of relief as they remembered that they had separate queen beds to sleep on. Kensi remembered that she had just sat on her bed when Deeks mumbled something about getting a shower and Kensi laughed out loud and told Monty how silly his daddy was.

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><p>"What's so funny Kensi?" Deeks had just come out of the water with his surf board and began to towel dry his hair and body.<p>

Kensi looked up and smiled at the man who, just one year ago, made her had driven her crazy – in many ways – when he was fired from NCIS. "I was just thinking about that night in the pool", Deeks smiled too and bent down to kiss her lips.

"That was a fun weekend", he gave her a quick kiss again before he got up to put a dry shirt on. "You said you had to get something from NCIS before we go home?" Deeks had the uncanny ability to subliminally get Kensi to do something he wanted, a few weeks ago he had asked her to move in with him seeing as they spent so much time their anyway. So now, even though she hadn't decided he had committed to calling his house their home.

"Oh, yeah I almost forgot", Kensi got up and shook the towel that she had been sitting on. "Let's go Monty".

… … …

As Deeks pulled into NCIS –he was still surprised that Kensi let him drive so often- he saw that the lights were off inside but shook it off because it was the holiday weekend, so people were probably at home with their family. Kensi got out of the passenger's side and took Monty out of the back of the car. "Kens, why are you bringing Monty?"

"No reason, it's just that he hasn't been here in a while, you can go on in we're coming". Kensi pointed to the door to Ops as she closed the trunk door of her car.

He shrugged his shoulders and pushed open the door to Ops.

"Surprise!" Callen, Sam, Eric, Nell and Hetty were standing in front of him with smiles on their faces. Kensi had just walked in behind Deeks and brought Monty from the car.

"Surprise Deeks, congratulations", Kensi beamed up at Deeks and she let Monty go so that she could hold Deeks's hand. "I thought you might like a party, and I knew that I would so here we are."

Deeks was grinning widely because his girlfriend was holding his hand, "This is great guys, but what's the celebration for?"

At that moment Hetty stepped forward and gave Deeks devious Hetty-smile as she held out a badge, "NCIS Special Agent Deeks, congratulations, you are officially off of probation and an official member of the NCIS family. Now who wants pizza?"

Deeks opened his new badge and had a thoughtful look on his face as he studied it. "Thanks guys, really."

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><p>"So you liked it?" Kensi held Deeks's hand as they walked into Deeks's apartment. It was just past midnight and they had spent the last five hours laughing with their friends at Ops, it couldn't have gone better.<p>

"I loved it, thank you Kensi, but I think that there's one other thing that you can do for me", Deeks raised his eyebrows,

"Oh really what would that be" Kensi out her hands on Deeks's chest, she had never been so in love with anyone not even Jack and would do anything for him.

Marty hugged Kensi as he restated his proposal, "agree to move in with me, and then I can finally sleep peacefully with you" he kissed her cheek and waited for her answer.

"Deeks…" Deeks cringed as he feared the worst "I would love to move in with you. I kinda love you, you know"

"Ha ha that's great! I kinda love you too, Fern".

"Deeks…".

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><p><strong>I am so sad to see this story end, I really enjoyed writing this, and maybe I just love writing dramatically!<strong>

**If you liked this story, please let me know.**

**Now I just need to figure out what to write about next! **


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